[video]

[polyonymous]

Right, so. Introductions. [Polite thing to do.] Name's Blackbeard!

[There's an odd pause here, like he's grown used to waiting out some kind of reaction. Metaphorical cricket chirping. The mirror continues to float in place, fuck all happens, and Ed fills the space by clearing his throat.]

Got wind of the basics here; pretty elaborate stitch up. Only, no one's been around to kick my teeth in for doing, uh, basically nothing, there's free food, free rooms, a ton of random cool shit- so what's the catch?

Little pixies gonna try to poke my eyes out with sticks if I don't help the magic talking trees? Not saying I'm totally opposed, just, you know, looking for an honest well-informed risk assessment type deal of what's at stake here. Alright. Uh, thanks. Done.

[Ed claps his hands together and stands up, then awkwardly strides forward to grab the mirror out of the air.]

Man, I dunno, feels fuckin' ridiculous talking to an empty room-

Comments

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[funhinged]

I thought you were great! Very clear and direct. Nothing ridiculous about that.

[ The mirrors are cool. Source: it's kind of like having a teeny tiny pocket Ed. Absolutely bananas. If Stede is also basically doing the magic mirror equivalent of texting from within a 20ft radius, that's his business. ]

Lucky for me you thought to ask about the important stuff. I wasn't even close to well-informed risk assessments yet.

[polyonymous]

Alright, well, I think you might be coming from a place of bias. [🙂] But it's nice you said so.

[Very disappointing that he cannot do any of his favorite 'elbow bumps Stede' or 'pats Stede's back' manoeuvres over the mirrors, but this point aside, Ed has to agree that he's a big fan.]

Awww, you know, no big deal. Kind of stuff you learn to think about when you've captained for awhile.

[or the kind of stuff you leave your first mate to suffer alone and deal with until you meet someone whose wellbeing you really care about lmao but either way!]

[funhinged]

[ Stede doesn't know the meaning of bias! That said, yes he does know and yes he's very biased all the time and it impacts most of his decision-making, especially where Ed is concerned.

But he still thinks it was good. ]

Don't go easy on me, Ed. We're in a sink or swim lifestyle. [ Magic! High adventure! Big weird castles! ] Not to say you couldn't pull off an eyepatch, but if pixies with sticks are an occupational hazard, it's better to just ask and avoid them, isn't it? I consider that a huge deal.

[polyonymous]

Maybe I should try an eyepatch out for a bit. Practise in case I ever do lose an eye. Bet fighting would be completely different.

[Mostly he sort of wants to see if Stede's right and he could pull it off, or if it would just look goofy.]

M'not going easy on you. Who said I was doing that? Because they're a liar. Never done that. Not about to start. So count out the chances of that happening, as zero.

[what were they talking about again???? is this flirting??? excellent questions!!]

[funhinged]

[ Ed's poor depth perception... truly a wise training project while there's time to pass, but at what cost. The aforementioned depth perception.

This is almost definitely flirting. You know, for them. ]

Good. I wouldn't want it any other way. [ He already canceled out the treasure hunt patronization because he got to keep the booty and it was some strange unprecedented miracle that Ed was still so game for it after the snake incident. ] Lest ye incur my terrible wrath.

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[timaeus]

[Oh. There's handwriting appearing in response. In...bright orange crayon. Guess that's what the crayons that came with the mirrors are for, then.]

It appears writing on the mirrors works as well, if that feels less awkward than doing the Snow White evil queen routine.

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[polyonymous]

[Ed can make out maybe a third of the message, but the rest is nonsense to him, and it has nothing to do with the bright orange. His face feels hot with embarrassment, so naturally he puts his best scowl on.]

Hey, yeah, can't read that. If you're giving advice, thanks, and if you're being an asshole, fuck you I guess. Just covering all options.

[timaeus]

[It probably says a lot about how Dirk grew up that the possibility of some level of illiteracy doesn't immediately occur to him. Whoops.]

Well, fuck you too, I guess.
Not claiming to be a professional calligrapher by any means, but I don't think my handwriting is that bad.

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[polyonymous]

[Maybe it's just the paranoia on main, but also maybe it's just the lived experience- Ed's 90% certain he's being mocked. His hackles are raised the maximum amount hackles can be.]

This is a joke, right? You're fucking with me right now.

[he's max 2 seconds away from asking Dirk how well he thinks he could read without eyeballs]

[timaeus]

Forgive me for my lack of flawless cursive.
Please accept this in its stead:

[Y'know what's a solid benefit of using a crayon over typed text? He can draw like this. What follows is a quick drawing of a dick. Childish, maybe, but one must tailor their material to the intended audience.]

[wisdomreceiver]

Blackbeard... [Henry gets pensive, not even planning to be rude on purpose] Are you gonna change it since your beard is grey now? I'm Henry, by the way.

[polyonymous]

[Far from taking offence, Ed just snorts a little.]

Yeah, thought about it, actually. I might- well. Yeah. I might. Hm.

So Henry, you got any actual advice for me?

[wisdomreceiver]

Advice about what?

[Which should probably be taken as a no.]

[polyonymous]

Forget about it, man.

[Ed knows a lost cause when one wanders aimlessly into his video replies. Maybe he can work on something else:]

How long you been here? In this castle.

[wisdomreceiver]

Oh, yeah, it's been a while. A few months, I think.

[Henry shrugs.]

This place is okay. There's fewer monsters than at home and it's cleaner, so that's good.

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[cspd]

Good to meet you, Mr. Blackbeard. My name is Lloyd.

[ Nobody else seems to be in a rush to get the useful information out there? This group, honestly... ]

While I don't think anyone can really force you to be helpful, we do get a lot of attention from nasty sorts, and most of them don't seem to pay much attention to picking out the most productive members of our group. If you're here with us, that's enough to make you a target.

[ So, you know. If you're going to have to defend yourself anyway. ]

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[polyonymous]

Lloyd.

[Yoooooo someone actually answering! Ed gives him a little wave, and nods his way through the info. It'd be easy enough to test out the reliability of this info next time a 'nasty sort' (???) pops up.]

Fair enough. Sounds like, if anything, it would be foolhardy to not stay involved and prepared. Probably safer, working with the group. That assumption sound accurate to you?

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[scansorial]

Honestly with all the weird magic and stuff with this castle the pixie thing would not surprise me. But uh. That's kinda part of the whole deal with being here. I guess. That we end up going all sorts of places to help out. Takes a bit of getting used to.

[To say the least.]

Honestly, the weird castle is still a step up from being pulled in the middle of the desert though. That was not fun.

Re: video

[polyonymous]

Can't say I've quite wrapped my head around it, myself.

[Which is like, a huge understatement. If Ed thinks about any of this for too long, his brain buzzes and fizzles out. Muuuuch easier to just think about his and Stede's safety.

Speaking of safety, here's another kid. God.]

S'that how you showed up? Seems a bit fucking weird. Like hey, we're recruiting you to fight our magical fight, don't mind us just dumping you somewhere you could starve or dehydrate first.

[scansorial]

I'm not sure many if any of us entirely have wrapped our heads around it completely. It's still a lot even being here for a little bit.

[Especially has he had been trying to juggle Spider-Man training and all and also meeting people as Miles. Who people already kinda figured was Spider-Man anyway but still. He is of course oblivious to Ed being rather Unsure on him being here, young as he is.]

But yeah. It was the worst first impression. 0/10, do not recommend. At least the castle is sheltered and not all sandy.

[polyonymous]

You could be a figment of my imagination I guess. Just some shit I dreamed up. Banged my head really hard on the deck maybe.

[Ed turns it over like it's a goofy fun concept and not existentially terrifying and then moves onto the far more important part of this convo:]

Hang on, how'd you end up here then? Doesn't look like we're anywhere near a desert. I mean, hard to tell for sure I guess.

[millenyal_pink]

Less little pixies and more the end of the world-- but yeah, that's the gist of it.

We're all trying to contribute to the group where we can, but no one's gonna kick your ass for taking some time to yourself. This shit's more than a little wild, an adjustment period is only natural now that we have an actual place of safety.

[A pause, because she definitely forgot to the polite thing and introduce herself.]

I'm Elle, by the way. Nice to make your acquaintance.

[polyonymous]

Mm, yeah, I did pick up on the general vague ominous vibe.

[It is good to know he and Stede don't have to worry about facing anyone's wrath for a lazy quest beginning.]

I don't- I'm not adjusting. I'm just, getting my bearings. Assessing. Just for the record.

[Results unclear on how this differs from adjusting.]

Elle. [He claps, trying to commit it to memory.] We'll be helpful participating group members when it matters, cross my heart.

[millenyal_pink]

The castle has been a place of safety, so far. I wouldn't let your guard down entirely, we haven't been here long enough for that, but it's certainly better than nothing. We've been trying to divvy up work in ways that make it fair, but there's no formal system or anything. Once you're up for it, feel free to ask around or take initiative.

[Elle smiles when he repeats her name.]

Well, your friend has already offered to do story time so I don't think you have to worry about group participation.

Also-- Blackbeard. Like the pirate? [If that is the case, this should be. Interesting. She only has a broad historical knowledge of pirate-y things, but it's enough for her to think she should keep an eye on him. He seems friendly enough, but better safe than sorry.]

No judgement. You can tell me to fuck off and I'll leave it alone.

[polyonymous]

Never let my guard down entirely. 'Specially not in bizarre magic castles. Just a good rule, I think. Uh, but yeah, sounds good.

[It's kind of weird to not be the one in charge, but kind of good, too. Freeing. Ed grins back, and it only stretches out further when she mentions Stede.]

Right. Can't let him manage that all on his own, though. Not very fair.

[The smile sort of stumbles and empties from his eyes when it's obvious Elle knows him by reputation. He hadn't really realised how he'd been holding his breath, waiting for someone to recognise him, hoping they wouldn't. So much for freeing.]

Yup. That's me. Scourge of the seas and all that. [He sighs a big blustery sigh.] Sort of thinking I might start introducing myself differently. Just call me Edward, yeah? Or Ed.