If a demon screams in the woods... [video]

[hellbentley]

[A redhead in sunglasses squints into the mirrors.]

[He's already had his moment of freaking out in the woods, already frantically looked around for his best friend who'd been sitting next to him before the ground fell out from under him, already spent time discovering the massive hit to his powers, and already freaked out about the loss of his wings.]

[He's gotten it out of his system, which is why Crowley's expression as he looks into the mirror looks a lot more like a very old person squinting into a smartphone and trying to figure out how to make a call.]

[His tone is almost bored. The calm is purely calculated.]

So, the whole Chosen one thing, who exactly's done the choosing?

[He sounds English. He kind of is, kind of isn't. Do you sound like you're from a place if you were there before the place even existed?]

[His tone is dry ice, each word carefully emphasized. He sounds unimpressed.]

I have notes.

Comments

audio bc aziraphale simply refuses to learn to do better mirror

[oldbookshop]

[ Somewhere in Trollmarket, Aziraphale lights up in the very specific and immediate sort of way that he can always get away with when he knows he's out of Crowley's line of sight. There's no avoiding it. He goes ahead and gets it over with.

This is maybe the best turn of note since this "Chosen one" business got started, is the thing. ]

You're late. [ He's trying to sound offended and put out. How very dare. The sheer audacity. It's mostly failing because Aziraphale is, above all else, hugely relieved. ]

Beyond fashionably, well past nefariously, and all the way into worryingly late, rather.

still video bc he knows how to participate in the current century

[hellbentley]

[He smiles despite the fact he can tell people can eavesdrop on these things. Can't be helped.]

[The relief and affection in his voice is also palpable.]

Angel.

[It is not outing him as one when it could easily be a nickname and he doesn't particularly care what others might discern from that kind of nickname.]

Maybe you're just too early. Shame on you, getting magically abducted before I did to what seems like - [his eyes dart around to look at his surroundings] - for all intents and purposes - another dimension or realm of existence. Terribly impolite of you. I think that puts me all the way back at 'fashionably' honestly, if you went on ahead.

[oldbookshop]

[ Introducing: the world's most dignified huff. ]

If you're going to be a menace about it, I think it puts you up to 'nefarious'.

[ If Aziraphale's already gotten to missing him, that's his business. (It's odd. Not having felt Crowley pop up. He's not sure he'll get used to that.)

There are the shuffling sounds of someone standing up and dusting their clothes off as best they can. ]

Would you say you've been heading in the direction you've felt pulled towards, or were you attempting to do the opposite?

[ Contrarians gonna contradict, sometimes. He couldn't hold that against him. ]

[diedforyoursins]

[Written text appearing on the mirror in a tidy cursive. In crayon.]

No one has said anything about it so far. Maybe none of us know. But it's a fair question.

video

[hellbentley]

What is this, primary school? Whatever took us is making us play with crayons?

[He's not playing with crayons.]

If there's an "us" exactly how many people have been Chosen One'd? Chosen'd.

[diedforyoursins]

You could try writing with another implement if you find any. Who can say what might work in a place like this?

But I've counted almost fifty people at this point. It really is past the point that we should be saying "chosen one". This seems closer to a fellowship.

[wisdomreceiver]

Where I am from I was 'the Chosen One' to be the last victim. Hopefully no one of us is going to get sacrificed in any way.

[hellbentley]

[He raises his eyebrows.]

The last victim of what?

[wisdomreceiver]

A series of murders to summon 'the Holy Mother'...Except the guy got a wrong idea and thought he would bring back his mother. Either way, I'm alive, so no demons yet.

[credit_not_blame]

We don't know yet. Well, I don't know yet, and if I find out someone here does know and hasn't told me, I will be wroth. And I will entice feral cats to pee in their shoes.

[hellbentley]

...I've got to say, I admire both the spite and the improvisation, given our current circumstances.

[credit_not_blame]

[Stacia beams.]

Why thank you! I figure that it's better for everyone if I'm clear about the sorts of things I find intolerable and the consequences that will result, especially if those consequences are both creative and plausible. Sticks in the memory better.

So much the better if the entity that's done the choosing also hears. I've got questions for them, possibly at a high volume.

[hasapoint]

[Need's Mindvoice comes in something like a whisper. It's stripped of all the usual connotations that come with Mindspeech, the emotional coloration, the imagery and fragments of ideas, but it's still not actually sound. The visual aspect is just cave ceiling.]

Were you here for that exciting scramble away from the fair?

[...oh shit if there's no connotations she can lie, like over a teleson.]

It's not usually as personal as 'choosing' when I'm called to someone's side. Usually, it's desperation and what's wrong becomes evident in a hurry.

[Not lying now, though.]

[hellbentley]

No faire, just trees. And more trees. And look at that, even more trees.

[He rotates his little mirror around to show the many many trees.]

Happy day if you like trees.

[A pause.]

Also, small question: what are you?

[hasapoint]

So you're new! You got to skip all of that. Good for you, boy.

I'm a nosy old woman, what are you?

[...still not actually lying. Just because she can doesn't mean she's going to depart from her beloved technical truths on a whim.]

[talk_radio]

♪Can't you see that I just don't know
Don't know♪

[Even in an alternate universe Crowley can't get away from Freddie Mercury, apparently.]

Sorry about that.

[hellbentley]

[Everywhere he goes, like clockwork.]

And let's have another "what are you" as well?

[He asks him just like he asked Need because. The fuck?]

[talk_radio]

I'm an alien robot. My name's Bumblebee.

Any other questions?

[hourglasshalfempty]

I think we'd all like to know that. Very much.

[hellbentley]

So let me get this straight. Strange voices making us all good and Choosen'd, forced unconscious, interdimensional kidnapping, vague instructions, and a mystical force driving us all together like cattle - probably expecting us to band together for a good kumbaya or two - and nobody's even taken proper credit?

[What a nightmare.]

Has anyone got even the teeniest hint about what we're meant to do?

[hourglasshalfempty]

Not so far. But at least one other force knows of us, and seeks our death. Insofar as I can deduce, we have been placed in the middle of conflict between two parties for control of this - plane of reality - and expected to, I presume, side with one or the other.

[slowmotionbuscrash]

Oooh notes, you can whack them with your legal pad. That’ll teach’em ey wot.

[hellbentley]

[His voice is desert dry.]

Oh there are teenagers here. Yay.

[kingofneworleans]

Dat, mon ami, is a question dat mos' of us would like answered.

[Remy's not bothering with sunglasses at the moment. So Crowley (and everybody else) are getting to see those strange eyes of his unfettered. He's doing an overhand shuffle of a deck of cards because it's quieter but still gives his hands something to do.]

Ain't my firs' rodeo wit' de whole 'Chosen One' t'ing, but it never stops bein' annoyin'.

[hellbentley]

[Hmm. He's curious about the eyes but doesn't comment on them.]

I'm not exactly someone most people would choose for anything.

[When you're a demon you're basically anti-chosen. Unwanted.]