okayimin: (listen here duster)
Sister Sara Sawbones ([personal profile] okayimin) wrote in [community profile] wildestlands2021-11-26 02:14 pm

Chantry Sanctioned Swears

[ The view from the mirror is mostly blurred trees as shaking hands fumble with it and a furious voice rants. ]

-expect me to believe this isn't some Fade nonsense. Of all the Stone deaf, sunblind, nugfucked shit-

[ The rant dies down to muttering, some creative profanities still audible. When the mirror is finally turned the right way, it shows a young woman (Dwarven to those who would recognize). She's wearing a nun's habit and wimple, though the reds and whites are a bit dull from dust and blood. A large s-shaped brand covers her left cheek. There are dark circles under her eyes. And she is clearly furious. ]

Right! I don't know what you lot are up to now, but I've had my fill of it. We're in the middle of a blasted war, if you haven't noticed. I'm very sure there are others who would be happy to indulge in this kind of magic-y surface dream business, however. I. Am. Busy.

[ She gestures with her free hand for emphasis. There's a bone saw in it. ]

If what those. Whatever they were that brought me here. Demons or spirits or what have you- Whatever they were, I was told there are others here. If that's the case, my name is Sister Sara, I'm a sawbones by trade. I'm hoping you lot are in better shape than the crew I just got yanked from, seeing as how these Fade creatures didn't even do the decent and bring my bag with me. I ain't sanctioned for it, but if we're in a pinch, I'll do your last rites. Don't reckon the Maker is too picky about who says the proper words in situations like this, so long as they get said. And if there's any of my company that happened to fall through with me, tell Sister Eloisa she can go to the fucking pit if she thinks for one minute-!

[ The rant and the recording will be abruptly cut short. Sawbones, resolutely marching away from the magical tugging feeling, is finally teleported to camp in all her bloody, exhausted fury.

The bone saw, however, has been lost to the forest.
]
unsealthecatbox: (7)

Audio

[personal profile] unsealthecatbox 2021-11-27 03:02 am (UTC)(link)
[The view from the mirror doesn't face Ange. It all shows the forest, somewhere among the trees]

We're alive and without lifechanging injuries after having faced a bunch of supernatural creatures with the side effect of making us relive our worst memories and two women trying to capture us for their lady's sinister purposes. Do we meet your lofty standards?

[Even though Ange says that sarcastically, she does feel a little bad for Sara here. Sounds like she was in the middle of something, if the word about war was any indication. Well, tough luck, she thinks]
steelandtemper: (22)

[personal profile] steelandtemper 2021-11-27 03:16 am (UTC)(link)
What's "Fade" in this context?

[Asks the obvious Fade spirit.]
steelandtemper: (18)

[personal profile] steelandtemper 2021-11-27 03:22 am (UTC)(link)
[Eyeroll.]

I'm not a spirit. [What is this superstitious nonsense.] I'm an AI.

[She's not in a particularly good mood, either, but an annoyed Cortana is a clipped, brisk Cortana. The torrent of abuse comes when she's worried and disguising it as anger.]
Edited 2021-11-27 03:22 (UTC)
unsealthecatbox: (11)

[personal profile] unsealthecatbox 2021-11-27 03:27 am (UTC)(link)
[Goodness, joke is on her, indeed, haha]

No, they're still alive. There's no way we won't face them again in the future. Whatever they are, I doubt they'll be deterred because we got away once.
steelandtemper: (16)

[personal profile] steelandtemper 2021-11-27 03:28 am (UTC)(link)
[FOR PITY'S SAKE.]

Artificial. Intelligence.
steelandtemper: (17)

[personal profile] steelandtemper 2021-11-27 03:40 am (UTC)(link)
[Put-upon sigh.]

I'm a self-aware computer.

[Sadly for everyone, she's lost her enormous AI speed advantage, so she hasn't had time to think all this through yet, and she's highly pop culture-deficient, so "isekai fantasy bullshit" is not going to occur to her.]
steelandtemper: (51)

[personal profile] steelandtemper 2021-11-27 03:50 am (UTC)(link)
[Okay, that gets her.]

...Yes?

[Literally what.]
steelandtemper: (25)

[personal profile] steelandtemper 2021-11-27 03:58 am (UTC)(link)
Because this is a two-dimensional projection of my hologram. [Wait.] ...Because my image is made of light.

[Technically so is Sawbones's, but Cortana doesn't want to teach Physics 101.]
unsealthecatbox: (11)

[personal profile] unsealthecatbox 2021-11-27 04:01 am (UTC)(link)
[The mirror finally shows who Sara is talking to. There's Ange, rooting through plants. Foraging and trying to find stuff, yeah]

At least a dozen, last I heard. The expertise of the mages of the group is...varied.

[To put it really kindly, but she's not sure. Ange certainly hopes there's more experienced mages in the group! Because if all the mages are bumbling around with their maybe-newfound magical powers as much as Ange is, then this party may be in big trouble, hah]
steelandtemper: (12)

[personal profile] steelandtemper 2021-11-27 04:11 am (UTC)(link)
[Genuine intellectual curiosity is fine. Cortana can absolutely roll with that, and her demeanor shifts to the more professional one she uses to deliver information. It's being challenged by superstitious weirdos she doesn't like.]

The light is self-generated. Changing the exact configuration and intensity changes the appearance.

[Pause.]

At least, that's how it usually works. I have no idea what kind of nonsense is going on with the mirrors.
steelandtemper: (05)

[personal profile] steelandtemper 2021-11-27 04:21 am (UTC)(link)
Not possible. I don't dream, and magic doesn't exist.

[Well, she's batting .500.]
the_hit_list: (63)

[personal profile] the_hit_list 2021-11-27 04:23 am (UTC)(link)
[ Tim will put aside his navel-gazing for something like this. ]

There isn’t any tech I’ve seen around here that could handle the demands of an AI. There isn’t any tech.

[ The AI is fascinating, and he will have questions, but right now he’s more interested in the potential for electronic and computer components. ]
unsealthecatbox: (1)

[personal profile] unsealthecatbox 2021-11-27 04:24 am (UTC)(link)
Any...templars?

[Templars...knights? Perhaps it's knights? There certainly is someone who brings to mind what you expect a knight to look like, now that she thinks about it]

Don't take it for granted, but maybe there's one. I didn't ask his profession.
steelandtemper: (21)

[personal profile] steelandtemper 2021-11-27 04:25 am (UTC)(link)
I'm willing to admit I don't know what's going on. I've been disconnected from all networks, and I'm not detecting any signals.

[She's not admitting to having been slowed down to squishy organic speed, though. At least, not yet.]

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